Thursday, 8 January 2015

We've got the parenting blues this week.

It's hard not to feel 'bleh' about everything when you're sick. My husband, 15 month old and I all have a cold at the moment and the past few days have been a struggle. Hubby went back to work on Monday this week after having a month off at home, he'd been sick for the last week and I was counting my blessings that my son and I had managed to avoid catching it. Naturally, we both fell sick Sunday night. Poor little bubba has had a rough time of it this week, his nose is all stuffed up and running all over the place, he has an awful sounding cough, nappy rash from having sick poo, and to top it all off he is teething more molars AND yesterday he took a tumble whilst outside and managed to bump his head on the concrete step. He has a bit of a red bump. He really has just been in the wars lately! We've both been plodding through the day as best we can which isn't easy when you aren't feeling 100%. Typical. My husband gets sick when he's home and can rest/eat whatever/do whatever then I get sick and it's full on 'take care of baby mode' after a month of having help around. It has definitely felt like we've been thrown out of the frying pan and into the fire.

I guess I've been feeling really 'bleh' about my crochet lately too. Too many thoughts on that to write about, but basically I've been feeling in a rut about it for a few months and I'm having trouble working out where I'm going with it. I guess there's a distinct line that's been forming between what I really want to do with it, and what I want out of it and then on the other side is how it's really been going, the direction it's taking and my not feeling overly satisfied with it. I love to crochet, that isn't the problem...it's just the things I want to be doing aren't happening. That's all a bit vague isn't it?
The thing is that there are blogs, magazine authors and pattern designers that I really admire that have (miraculously) put so much into their craft that they've made something of themselves doing it. I don't expect in this day and age to form a career out of crochet, I am unfortunately too much of a realist to believe that is possible, but there are certain goals and dreams I'd like to see come true in my life time. I completely believe that I have something to offer, I just don't know exactly what that is yet or where there is in the world for me to offer it. Maybe I'm just expecting a path to carve out in front of me or maybe I just want something to happen faster? See? It's a scary and confusing place inside my brain!! I like to be out of it whenever possible, coffee helps there. And ignorance. (Yes, yes, bad pregnant mummy still has a cup of instant coffee a day).

Anyway, how has the beginning of this fabulous new year been treating you? Any big plans? I know a lot of people who can expect to see great things come from 2015 and I'm excited to follow their journeys. I don't know what it holds for us yet. It means welcoming a new baby to our upside down kind of life! That is certainly something to be happy and excited about :-) If I'm totally honest with you, I'm terrified of having a newborn and an under 2 year old in the same house with just me the majority of the time to care for them both. I'm not totally convinced I'm capable of it, but we'll just take it as it comes and hope that it will work out somehow. As it is I've spent the past hour trying to get my little one to take a sleep, he's already been let out once for another short play and a cuddle and I thought he'd sleep the second time but the crying is telling me otherwise. How on earth do I do this with two?!




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