Wednesday, 14 February 2018

Slowing down under pressure


I'm experiencing a case of the 'completely unmotivated to do the things that need doing'...it's not fun. Both kiddies have colds at the moment and sleeping is a thing they aren't doing (although it's never been a strong point of theirs anyway really, but it did get better), it's absolutely humid and hot as balls here in old Port Mac, we're all tired and grumpy, it's just bleeeeeegh. Boob sweat, guys. Boob sweat.

The list of things to get done include taking L up for his 4 year old health check, going to the dr to get a new script for the happy pills for another few months, both of those things involving a VERY FUCKING LONG wait at the 'super clinic' up the road. I know from experience that taking two boys in there for even an hour of waiting is a nightmare, not even gonna try while they're both sick, not even gonna try walking up in this shitful heat, and not even gonna try and manage that on the very little amount of sleep I've had. Safe to say I scratched that off the list until further notice... however the knowledge that it still needs to be is lurking lurking lurking.
Money is stressing me the fuck out as well, but it always does that, so not much point giving to much more worry to that than usual. The fact I'm sweating all over and grimy is not helping. As I sit here typing I pine, I yearn, I dream of a shower but as the bathroom shares a wall with Bryce's room and after an hour of trying to get him to calm down and take a nap, and the silence that has finally befallen his room, there's no way I'm going to risk disturbing that. No way at all.
And so to ease this feeling of 'what the fuck am I doing with myself' I decided to put a plan into action I had for my room. I'd wanted to rearrange it for the past month or so but knew that it would be a whopping great task to achieve on my own. OF COURSE I decided to tackle that this morning on my own, because I'm either extremely determined, extremely stupid, or a bit of column A and B combined. As I went about huffing and puffing dragging furniture about I thought about how a task can seem impossible until it's done. Choosing to send something into chaos so that we can rearrange, adjust, start over, is sometimes necessary for the better. I was thinking how moving things that were probably a bit too heavy for me to manage but succeeding anyway reminded me that we're capable of more than we often perceive ourselves to be capable of. I stood in the center of a massive disorganised kerfuffle and thought 'what the hell have I done?' but knew that going forward was the only way... I couldn't very well leave it as it was! And when the moving of furniture was done, and the floor was vacuumed, a scented candle had been lit, the kitten playing on my bed, my closet sorted through and emptied of what I didn't need, the curtains were open, my scarves were neatly organised onto new hooks, I stood and smiled because not two hours before all of it was simply an idea. An idea I took into my own hands and bought to life.
Perhaps the metaphor seems a bit menial but it was so prominent in my thoughts I wanted to write about it.
"Doing the thing IS the thing" 
meaning that it isn't only when the task is completed that you should feel satisfied that you've achieved something, because we'll always have tasks to achieve after that and the feeling will come again, but it's the knowledge that you have a thing to do, or want to do, and plan to make it happen. There's no use in thinking "Once I do this, I'll find peace", find peace in the moment and in yourself as you go about your tasks and life and you'll shake loose that hurried sense of 'I must do this, and this, and that, and remember to go here, then go there'. You can do absolutely anything! But you can't do everything at once. And that right there is a thing I find myself struggling with every damn day. But hey, I'm working on it! Xx

Monday, 12 February 2018

Project Pan #3 February


I missed January! I must have been busy and wasn't able to put the post together, but here we are with the 3rd installment of Project Pan. If you don't know what Project Pan is, you can start at my first PP post {HERE}, and follow that up with the second one {HERE},but in a nutshell it's using up makeup products that you either want to replace or get rid of but concentrating on using those items as often as possible in your makeup routine. I have a number of things in my own Project Pan I'd like to use up for various reasons - in the case of my Gerard Cosmetics setting spray I want to use it because it cost me $30 and while it works well the smell is just hideously overwhelming of cucumber! Like can't breathe while applying or for a short while after intense. The goal with that is to empty it with frequent use and then get some MAC Fix+ to replace it.

1. Primer - e.l.f Poreless Face Primer and BYS Luminizing Foundation Primer
Hmm, primer-wise still working on that e.l.f stuff. No idea what progress I've made because I can't see into the frosted bottle *sniff* It is starting to sputter when I pump it so fingers crossed. The luminizing BYS primer has been hard to love in this heat. I can't use it on its own which is a pain in the butt. It pills when used on its own.


2. Foundation - MUD Flawless Finish in soft beige
MUD foundation - I've thrown both the shades I owned into the bin. Why? Because I've since come to the realisation that my itchy face was only happening the days I used that foundation ergo skin reaction! So that takes those out of my Project Pan!
3. Colour Correct - BYS Conceal and Correct
I'll use this on occasion but since improving my skin care routine I've noticed my redness has significantly reduced (thank you Palmer's Eventone!!) and I haven't needed the green. I've also been using Garnier Miracle Eye Cream which colour corrects on skin-contact, as well as concealing UNDER my foundation so I haven't had much use for that, either. Nevertheless I've made a small amount of progress.

4. Contour - MUD Defining Contour and Highlight
MUD contour and highlight... welllllll ok I admit I sort of haven't used this at all. I am SO bad at this Project Pan thing! Haha! Ok maybe I should put all my items into a basket to reach for first, that would probably be the smart thing to do. (Shoulda done that from the start, hey? Ooooopsies)

5. Brows - L.A Girl Inspiring Brow Kit
Brow powder... chucked it out!! Why? Because it was making my skin itch as well. So take that out of Project Pan aswell. I'm glad I've been using these things more exclusively though so I'm able to pinpoint what's causing the problems. Instead I've been using either a pencil or the 'Barbados' eyeshadow shade in the Ashley Tisdale Illuminate palette.
6. Powder - Covergirl Loose Powder in 110 Translucent Light
The powder I've been using over my Coty Airspun everytime! I'm really enjoying it! Perhaps I've tanned a little this Summer because the tone is suiting me a lot nicer.

7. Blush - L'Oreal Paris in 90 Luminous Rose
The blush is being very slowly chipped away at... very slowly. Blush is just one of those things you seriously don't need much of. It's gonna take me a while.

8. Highlight - Mermaid Salon Tokyo Lights
The highlighter I've all but given up on... it's just do darn chunky and hard to love! Mermaid Salon is so touch and go with their products I feel, or maybe this style of highlighter just isn't my jam. Either way, I know I've hardly touched it but this month, starting today, I'm going to use it every day until my next PP. I tell ya it's going to be one heck of a challenge not to reach for my beloved W7 Glocomotion or e.l.f Moonlit Pearls.

10. Lips - Rimmel Stay Glossy in 260 My Eternity
The gloss in my PP I'm struggling to use because honestly I'm learning I'm not much of a gloss person. The perils of having a lot of thick hair and a small face with a close hairline means that nomatter how I wear my hair, it gets stuck to my gloss. I haven't used it all month.
11. Concealer - Rimmel Wake Me Up in very fair/light
Concealer? Still love it, still using it. Still not empty.

Empties? Forgot I was posting about those and didn't keep them. Whoops. It was nothing beauty related

No-buy? Fail. I ordered a whole lot of skin and hair care stuff on Cosmetic Capitol which I could almost justify because skin and hair care is like underpants, it's essential right? But then I went to Beserk and got myself four new Concrete Mineral loose shadows, Sugar Pill purple liquid lip, and preordered the absolutely STUNNING Sugar Pill Little Twin Stars palette. There are a shit-tonne of new releases in the beauty world that catch my eye *cough* Jouer funfetti highlighter *cough*, but, while I admire them they're usually a) WAY too expensive b) can't be bought on Afterpay which is my only method of owning nice things or c) not available in Australia, this palette just sung to my heart and I NEEDED it with a deep and intense passion. I mean just look at it! Be still my beating heart. I'll eat two minutes noodles for a month for this.
The next post I'm working on is another makeup related one, then a catch up on my garden, charity crochet, sketches, I'll get to those. The kids both have colds at the moment and the Octonauts DVD I put on to write up this post has ended so I best be off!

Friday, 2 February 2018

Doin a nail art


I read somewhere on a 'how to' blogging site recently that to create good content you can always share what you know about something. Well, I know how to do gradient nails with a sponge and even though there are a million other videos demonstrating the same thing out there in Internet Land you're here on my blog, on this post. Kudos to you! Thanks for joining me on my 'Tash makes videos' journey, I'm still learning but it's really cool branching into something new. We all have to start somewhere, right?
Anyhoo, here's a little video I made on gradient nail painting. Do enjoy!

Thursday, 1 February 2018

28 Days Later...


Hello blog,
Some updates! Since it's the first day of a new month (already... how fucking fast did that go?!) I'm going to go over some stuff. First off I want to congratulate myself on not buying any makeup for a whole month, so round of applause for me. I kept track of every cent spent in a journal and I tell ya, I REALLLLLY don't have a lot of wiggle room financially. But it's cool, we manage, as we always do. I'm working on paying off the last of my Afterpays (B's bed frame and Moira's cat carrier) and then I hope to keep it empty for the month of Feb. Secondly I've decided that to get my arty sense tingling again after a too-long hiatus I'm going to do a pencil sketch of my kitten every day for a month. She's often not still for long unless she's asleep under my bed and therefore unreachable, so the challenge is to try and capture her shapes and form as quickly as I can. I'd like to do some studies of her paws, nose, eyes, direction of her fur, the shape of her spine and tail when she's in different positions. Practice makes perfect and I want to improve my drawing from life skills. Today's sketch is in the collage above. She was sitting on my bookcase in front of the window. At the end of the month I'll have 28 sketches of my cat.
Next up we've got my plastic bag rug progress! It's coming along well, and I've used more than half my plastic bags!! It's a groovy project to sit down and add to it at night. And speaking of adding to a project I've also got a previously-unfinished-then-stashed-in-a-container-with-many-others crochet blanket on my bedside table that I'm working on. This year I have a goal to work on all my started then stashed crochet blankets so that I can create lapghans from them and donate them to Bundaleer Retirement Home. I'm not yet sure where the plarn rug will go but if I can get it big enough then it'll be great for the back room as there's a concrete floor out there.

And finally there is a small tarot reading I pulled for myself this morning. I'd used my RWS deck as a prop for a photograph yesterday so it was on my desk, and today after doing my makeup I felt the urge to pick it up and give it a good old shuffle. I didn't get far before three cards flipped themselves over so I laid them out in the order they'd been given and had a ponder about what it could mean.
I had intended I think to pull some general card(s) for the day, I didn't ask a question, so I feel this applies to something today. Given that sleep has been a huge issue in my house lately I would suggest it means to abandon the idea of the boys sharing a room, get past the constant wake ups and bed time struggles, 5 am starts, and keeping the cat away from L (otherwise he just wants to play at night), and separate them again.  Ergo= happy kids, happy ending. There is one other possible meaning to this spread but I feel it doesn't relate as strongly as the sleeping arrangements at home right now. This of course means taking a bed apart and rearranging everything again *sigh* But it needs to be done.

Oh! Other news... puss puss goes in for her desexing surgery tomorrow! Poor little lass will need extra care and attention over the weekend. I'm not allowed to feed her after 8pm tonight, she's going to be very unhappy with me!

Slowing down under pressure

I'm experiencing a case of the 'completely unmotivated to do the things that need doing'...it's not fun. Both kiddies hav...